Williamsburg is Dead

Live on the Edge

Like Mr. Burns' infamous sun-blocking device, the soaring Edge complex enshrouds the townspeople in constant darkness. Oh, how we've oft cursed those wealthy condo dwellers who sit upon their Saarinen thrones, scoffing at us from on high. Until now! Because you can become a fancy-pants Edge resident by applying for the affordable housing lottery by December 3rd. This is basically a process in which the foppish Lords of Edgetown deign to open their palace to the poors due to government decree with apartments at extremely somewhat affordable rents. Here is the breakdown:

Apartment size	Household size	Monthly Rent	Total annual income range
Studio	1	$886	$37,370-$43,000
1 bedroom	1	$995	$41,919-$43,000
1 bedroom	2	$995	$41,919-$49,150
2 bedrooms	3	$1,198	$50,287-$55,300
2 bedrooms	4	$1,198	$50,287-$61,450

You qualify! Now you just need to apply by stopping by the NAG (Neighbors Allied for Good Growth) office at 101 Kent St (at the corner of N 8th St) on Monday on the hour, every hour from 12pm-7pm, Tuesday from 12pm-2pm and 4pm-7pm, and Wednesday from 10am-2pm. Good luck, future pretend rich person.

Transportation Town Hall Meeting Tonight

Williamsburg Transforms into "Little Europe"

In a recent study, a full 33 percent of the residents of my Williamsburg apartment were found to be Swedish photographers.

I long ago stated that Europeans would help stave off degentrification of Williamsburg, and apparently I'm right. According to the NY Times, le French and le Swedes and le British have been settling here in droves. Apparently they love the artsy atmosphere and the fact that the U.S. dollar is pretty much like Monopoly money compared to the Euro. Chirag Patel and Cecilia Trollby's building is basically a mini-United Nations:

"Their building at 100 North Third Street has a familiar international feel: 10 of the 21 buyers are from France, Japan, Germany and the Netherlands, according to the building’s real estate agent and broker, Tom Le of the Corcoran Group."

Apparently places like Fabian's, Spike Hill, Mamalu, Urban Rustic and Phoebe's Cafe are full of Europeans, so if you totally have a thing for European accents, there you go. I first noticed this trend when I wanted to waste a spring Sunday afternoon playing ping pong and drinking Hoegaarden at Iona,  but could barely get into the bar because Czechoslovakia was playing Germany or something in a game of footballsoccer. As opposed to the European immigrants of old, these ones wear flawlessly stylish clothes, go to special Swedish mothers' groups and are generally beloved by the other Williamsburg residents who wouldn't mind EU citizenship. Seriously, I want to live in Europe, please marry me random European stranger.

SECRET LATE-NIGHT RAMEN SPOT DISCOVERED!

Not since Hiram Bingham discovered Machu Picchu in 1911 has a discovery of this magnitude registered on the OMG scale. Serious Eats reports that a late-night, pop-up ramen joint called Bonjin arrives every Friday night at Dokebi from 12am-4am to feed drunken Williamsburg revelers. 

"While I'm used to seeing pork belly with my ramen, Bonjin's ramen ($10) was also topped with arugula, corn, and thin fried noodles. Fatty, bitter, sweet, and crunchy—a great combination. The medium-bodied broth was made of chicken, pork, and vegetable stock—cooked for about 14 hours—mixed with five kinds of miso, sake mash, and soy milk."

New itinerary for Friday night: 1) Drink beer 2) Eat ramen. [Serious Eats]

What Williamsburg is Watching

 

Diner, starring not only Steve Guttenberg but also Tim Daly, is Williamsburg's 24th most rented movie.

Hrrm, I'm pretty sure Gawker or someone already did this, but I'm going to write about it anyway because my brain has stopped working. It's Williamsburg's top 25 rented Netflix movies!

It turns out that Williamsburgers are fairly sophisticated cinephiles. Godard is well represented with "Le Petit Soldat" and "Band of Outsiders," while Antonioni and Cassavetes are also present. You Brooklynites also have an affinity for Spike Lee, with "Crooklyn," "Do the Right Thing," and "Clockers" all on the list.

My favorite selection, however, is one that pretty much sums up the anxieties of apartment hunters in Williamsburg:

The Sentinel: Model Alison Parker (Cristina Raines) gets a great deal on a Brooklyn, N.Y., apartment -- but there's just one catch: It's also the gateway to Hell, and she's on the invite list.

Ha! I'm pretty sure the movie is based on my first apartment in Bushwick. And the number one film on this hipster-heavy 'hood's queue? That would be "A Life Apart: Hasidism in America." It's a documentary starring Leonard Nimoy! Either hipsters are learning about their devout neighbors or the Hasids are learning a little bit about themselves.

P.S. Definitely check out Charles Burnett's poignant 1977 drama about urban life in South Central L.A. "Killer of Sheep."

The entire list after the jump ...

Kellogg's Diner Maintains Reputation as "Worst Diner in the History of Mankind"

So, remember when everyone was all like "Kellogg's is getting a fancy new chef and menu!" Well, that chef has walked away because the long-standing owners want it just the way it was: god-awful. Plus, The Dirty Burgher just ate there last night and said they had the same craptastic food as always. So yeah, Kellogg's is back to the way it was, and we can go on avoiding it in favor of late-night sandwiches from Hana Food. [Grub Street]

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP SAYING THE WORD HIPSTER

Twee Tuesday!

Time to dust off your corduroy blazer, get the walking stick out of your quaint country attic and traipse across the meadow to your favourite record shop. A new (kind of) collection of Belle and Sebastian songs is for sale today! It's called The BBC Sessions, and it basically consists of BBC recordings from 1996-2001. Plus if you get the bonus double CD you'll get an entire Christmas concert from Belfast from 2001. Oh happy days!

Give the Finger to the Finger

Stand up, young Williamsburgites! NAG just sent out this call to arms:

Neighbors Allied for Good Growth (NAG), the People's Firehouse, and several community residents are appealing the Dept of Building's (DoB) decision regarding the validity of the permit for the "Finger Building” (located at 144 North 8th St between N 7th and N 8th and Bedford and Berry).

Although the building is 10 stories tall right now, the DoB has NOT revoked the permit that allows the developer to more than double the current height!!

The Brooklyn DoB Commissioner wrote that the permit is valid because the architect, Robert Scarano, and the developer, Mendel Brach, "BELIEVED" they could use the neighboring roofs for the required "open space". Yet every related legal document (easements, etc.) expressly disallows the use of those rooftops.

The bottom line is that the DOB should insure that the building complies with zoning laws rather than the beliefs of self-interested developers.

The public hearing will be held at: Board of Standards and Appeals (BSA), Tuesday, November 18th 10am, 40 Rector St., 6th Floor: Hearing Room E (Take the #1/ W/R train to Rector St. or the 4/5 trains to Wall St in Manhattan)

Celeb Spotting: Bret McKenzie from FOTC

OMG, so I was walking down Union, singing the "Mermaids" song from Flight of the Conchords in my head, when who do I see but Bret McKenzie walking into Dumont with two similarly shaggy, black-haired dudes. It was 3pm, so I assume it was a late brunch, or perhaps it was a "second breakfast" as the hobbits, also natives of New Zealand, are so fond of.

Seriously though, I had to fight off my Mel-like instinct to follow him into the restaurant and ask him to be my best friend. That reminds me, I saw the guy who plays Doug a couple of weeks ago in a bar near Times Square. Come be my best friends, entire cast of Flight of the Conchords!